Wherever You Go, There You Are: Mindfulness Meditation in Everyday Life

Non-doing in action requires intense practice and mastery; only then can one completely lose themself in an action, rather than needing to think through the specific steps. It is also known as a flow state. Kabat-Zinn explains that actions performed in a flow state are synonymous with meditation; both entail the complete and appreciative participation in each moment and the practice of allowing each moment to give way to the next.

Cultivating ethical values and practices assists in meditative practice because the harmonious state of meditation can’t be achieved without a commitment to living well and consistently with one’s values. In particular, cultivating patience helps in embodying mindfulness, as does peaceful compassion; this is demonstrated by the Dalai Lama, a Tibetan, who spoke lovingly and kindly toward the Chinese despite their policy of genocide toward the Tibetan people.

Patience and compassion practiced in life helps with meditative practice, and patience and compassion in one's meditative practice helps one to embody these values in their life; it creates a positive feedback loop. These values remind us to let moments unfold, rather than to push and pull angrily and frustratedly at life’s unfolding.

In a “Try” activity, Kabat-Zinn asks readers, when they are feeling blocked or overwhelmed by stress or anger, to sit quietly and just breathe. Instead of pushing the river (an allusion to his previous metaphor about our stream of thoughts being a river), he encourages readers to dispassionately observe the river (i.e., observe their thoughts). Any actions should be undertaken mindfully, rather than rashly, after carefully tuning in to one's inner self. Above all, Kabat-Zinn recommends trying to embody patience in these moments.

The practice of letting go encourages one to cease clinging to ideas, desires, particular times, regrets, or events. Instead, these things should be released into the present moment, which is constantly unfolding. When concepts “stick” in our mind, we ourselves get stuck. Failing to let go means further obscuring our view of the present moment. Letting go rather than holding on brings a greater level of satisfaction and peace.

In trying to master a meditative practice, one will become aware of the constant judgmental voice in one's own head, which perceives everything through a lens of fear, or through expectations or standards we make for ourselves. Judgmental and fear-based thinking narrows our outlook and our experiences. Our thinking is ruled by these thoughts; meditation asks us to cultivate a mindset that opposes this automatic state: one that does not judge.

When we don’t recognize our judgmental and limiting thoughts for what they are, we allow them to rule us. These narrowing and limiting thoughts are disempowered when they are recognized, labeled, and released down the flow of the thought river.

Trust is another important value to cultivate in achieving mindfulness. It allows one to embrace the unhurried flow of one moment to another if one has a grounding trust (in oneself and in the moment) that things will turn out well.

Letting go and fully embracing the texture of the present moment fosters a feeling of trust in that moment and therefore in the goodness of life’s moments more generally. In this way, choosing to trust fosters further trust, aiding one’s journey toward mindfulness.

Like patience, letting go, non-judging, and trust, fostering generosity as an inherent and defining value assists in a mindful mindset. Kabat-Zinn suggests generously giving to oneself and others, and self-acceptance is an important gift to give to oneself daily. Giving to others can mean material possessions, but it can also mean enthusiasm, vitality, encouragement, trust, or love. Mindful, selfless generosity will leave one feeling buoyed and energized, rather than depleted.

Kabat-Zinn warns against, consciously or unconsciously, building a self-image as wise or invincible based on one’s meditative practices; this flies in the face of meditation, which urges one to feel honestly and completely. Giving the impression that one is invulnerable to hurt or pain is ultimately damaging and isolating. It causes a person to lose touch with their true feelings and can often cause others, who further project this image of invulnerability onto the person, to deplete them.

One should be in touch with and open about one’s feelings. This may look like weakness, but it is actually strength.

In a “Try” activity, Kabat-Zinn asks readers to feel what they are feeling, rather than judging themselves. When they notice themselves becoming hardened in the face of an obstacle, Kabat-Zinn urges them instead to soften. This demonstrates trust in oneself and one’s experience of the moment.

Kabat-Zinn urges readers to intentionally do just one thing and commit fully to doing it. That thing will be far more satisfying for having solely focused one’s attention on it. Even the busiest life provides ample opportunity for choosing simplicity. Saying no, to people and to inner impulses for noise and distraction, is an essential part of simplifying one’s life, even though Kabat-Zinn acknowledges that this is enormously challenging in our busy modern world, particularly if one has various responsibilities as a parent, son/daughter, employee, partner, pet owner, or friend.

Concentration is an essential component of practicing mindfulness. Cultivating focus and allowing one to turn attention to only one thing, such as one’s breath, is a significant challenge, but once mastered, it can provide incredible stability and calmness of mind.

Concentration is admirable but incomplete on its own without mindfulness. Mindfulness brings characteristics of openness, curiosity, compassion, and engagement with the world, which makes the practice meditative.

A personal manifesto, or vision, for why meditation is important in one’s life is an essential part of daily practice. Meditation must be done with intentionality, motivated by a deep-seated belief in the benefits it will bring to one’s life. Otherwise, the practice will fall by the wayside.

Kabat-Zinn gives the example of mitigating anger through mindful observation of that anger: appreciating and witnessing the anger and then choosing how to act on it mindfully, rather than mindlessly. This is a strong motivator for creating a daily meditation practice.

In a “Try” exercise, Kabat-Zinn asks readers to list why they want to meditate and to carefully examine the list in terms of how it reflects their vision of who they are and who they want to be.

Kabat-Zinn explains that the translation of the word bhavana, one of many ancient Indian words for meditation, translates to “development through mental training” (65). Kabat-Zinn creates a metaphor to explain his understanding of the process of exploring and mastering our internal landscape: Like characters in ancient fairy tales, we must encounter challenging landscapes and terrifying demons in our own minds. Like the characters in fairy tales, who often spend years laboring or searching, this is a “tempering process,” whereby we are better for our challenging labor (67). It is the “development of depth of character through knowing something of the tortuous labyrinthine depths and expanses of our own minds” (67).

In a “Try” exercise, Kabat-Zinn encourages readers to position themselves as the story’s sage, King, or Queen (continuing to draw on his fairy tale metaphor) while meditating and to “lay out the welcome mat” for the monsters in the labyrinth. The reader’s breath will guide them through this labyrinth, and mindful awareness will help them to encounter, appreciate, and know these monsters while not being vanquished by them.

Kabat-Zinn draws on many religious and spiritual practices, such as Taoism and Buddhism, which represent enlightenment as a journey that must be traveled. Meditation is better conceived of as a way along the journey of life, rather than a technique.

Kabat-Zinn conveys the message of an old fairy tale, which tells the story of three brothers looking for a life-saving elixir for their father, the King. The first two brothers condescendingly dismiss a dwarf who enquires where they are going; these brothers become stuck in a ravine. The third brother respectfully dismounts and explains the predicament to the dwarf, admitting that he has no idea where he is going; the dwarf reveals that he knows the location of the elixir and explains it to the third brother. This story serves as an example of the importance of being open to help and admitting that one may not know where one’s going. Interpreted another way (if the story were to metaphorically take place in one’s mind), it also attests to the importance of listening to one's inner wisdom (i.e., the dwarf), rather than plowing on blindly.

In a “Try” activity, Kabat-Zinn recommends viewing one’s life as an unfolding adventure and to consider what chapter of the journey is currently being experienced. Are there any sticking points? How can meditation help one to appreciate the current moment as well as light the way forward?

Kabat-Zinn clarifies that awareness is not the same as thought; it is beyond thought, allowing us to see the present moment for what it is, rather than viewing it through the confusion of our fragmented thoughts. Thinking positively is actually just engaging in producing more fragmented thoughts, which may be useful and beneficial, but is not meditating.

Using the terms “inward” and “outward” (i.e., conceiving of meditating as leaving the “outward” world to travel “inward”) is limiting, as meditating involves turning inward to find that “we contain the entire world in our own mind and body” (73). Furthermore, turning inward affects our conception of what is outward.

Spending time turned inward teaches us how false it is to rely on external validation or support systems for happiness because we learn to know and love our authentic selves with peace and acceptance.

In a “Try” activity, Kabat-Zinn urges his reader to look inward, rather than outward, to find peace the next time they are dissatisfied. Instead of seeking distraction or validation, let things be as they are and observe breathe.