What to Say Next

The narration switches to Kit’s first-person monologue. Kit muses that her decision to not sit with her best friends, Annie and Violet, for lunch is due to an inability to “act like [she] [i]s the same old reliable Kit” (20). She is beginning to understand that “there is no way” to process her grief (21), and she feels that David’s quietness is her “best bet.” She feels a connection to David’s “nerdy” hobbies and awkwardness, though she feels discomfited that David has “opted out of even trying to act like everyone else” (22). She recalls his sister Lauren’s popularity, which she feels has insulated David from being “eaten alive” at their high school.

Kit agrees with David’s disbelief in heaven, though she doesn’t want to discuss her father’s death. David is unperturbed by her request for silence, instead studying a copy of the DSM-IV. Violet and Annie text, demanding to know why Kit didn’t sit with them. Kit doesn’t reply, which she knows will anger her friends. She knows that she would have been angry whether her friends noted the one-month mark after her father’s death or ignored it, though she resents that their silence implies that they have forgotten the significance of the day. She finds it “so strange” that David “of all people […] said the exact right thing” (26).

She recalls asking her mom, Mandip, to let her stay home from school; Mandip refused and went to work herself. Kit considers the irony of how she has no physical injuries despite her intense inner pain and, though she considers minor self-harm, does not hurt herself.

David takes off his headphones in the hallways, contrary to his habit, to listen for gossip about Kit’s father. He googles Kit’s father and learns that Robert Lowell died in a car accident. He encounters Gabriel Forsyth, who is best friends with Justin Cho, “the president of the Do Not Trust club” (32). A group of girls whom Miney termed “THE POPULAR BITCHES” call David a “freak” when he bumps into them (32). He wants to ask why the girls dislike him but instead quietly tries to ignore the strong smell of Gabriel’s body spray as class begins.

Kit arrives late to class, receiving no reprimand from their teacher, which David recognizes as deference to her loss. He considers the public standing of his family; his mother and sister are popular in their social circles, while his father, a medical researcher, is (per David’s mother) similar to his son. David finds “hope” in this, as his parents’ strong relationship indicates that he, too, might have romantic success.

Midway through class, Kit leaves abruptly, which leads the other students to gossip. David feigns a migraine and follows her to the football field. He struggles to tell if Kit is annoyed by his check-in, musing that this sudden interest in her was not “part of today’s plan” (40).

Kit finds David’s presence “weird” but invites him to sit with her on the bleachers. She tries to recall information about him to avoid awkwardness, though she allows that “awkward” is her primary descriptor for David. Her dad, several months prior, encouraged her to get to know David; Kit regrets responding sarcastically. They talk briefly and then lapse into a comfortable silence while Kit muses that it’s nice to sit with someone who doesn’t expect her to speak.

Kit skips the remainder of the school day, heading home to watch television instead of doing any of her homework. Her mom arrives home and confesses that she feels stressed about the non-work aspects of her life now that her husband is gone. She thinks about how her mother’s immigrant parents have long since returned to living in India, leaving Mandip with little support. The relationship between Kit and her grandparents is fraught, as they did not approve of their daughter marrying a white man. Kit reflects on her grandparents’ colorism and anti-fat bias.

Kit expresses her love for her mom, though she recognizes that the absence of usual irritation with her mother is the “grief talking.” Kit’s mother briefly references her husband’s death, and Kit is disappointed when she quickly moves away from emotional topics.

The next day, Kit surprises David by sitting at his lunch table again. He reflects that Kit is perhaps the only person he would welcome sitting with him. When asked why he sits alone, he expresses that the coincidences that made them classmates are not sufficient to make him want to “waste” time talking to people he doesn’t like. Kit clarifies that her true question was whether sitting alone made David feel lonely. He confirms that it did, which she teases makes him more like his classmates than he originally thought.

Kit explains, at David’s probing, that she sat with him because he would “leave [her] alone” if asked (56). Her friends would make anti-fat comments about her “eating [her] feelings” (56), to which David offers statistics about weight averages. He claims that she would be “beautiful” regardless of her weight; this makes Kit blush, which David mistakes for eczema. He feels pleased that he is succeeding at “banter.”

Later, David muses that he is glad that he is different from how teenagers are “supposed” to be, giving movies as examples of normalcy, since he likes his family. He tells his mom, Amy, about his interaction with Kit, asking if it “makes sense” that he thinks Kit “appreciates [his] weirdness” (59). Amy confirms that she thinks he and Kit could be good friends.

David has a guitar lesson with his teacher, Trey, who irritates David by “[lecturing] about life” instead of sticking to guitar (61). Trey urges David to participate in a guitar showcase, but David refuses. Later, David practices Krav Maga, picturing himself as a hero who saves Kit from someone stealing her purse.

Violet and Annie, wearing matching expressions of “faux pity,” meet Kit after school. Violet is emotionally “gooey,” and she dresses in a preppy manner that reflects her parents’ (who, Kit notes, regularly commit racist microaggressions). Annie’s bolder personality pushes the other two friends to “live bigger lives” (66).

Annie insists that Kit’s distance is making her “worried,” while Violet steps into the peacemaker role. Kit struggles, unable to articulate what she needs. She rushes away from her friends, skipping an important meeting of the school newspaper, which jeopardizes her chances at becoming editor-in-chief, a previously important goal.

Kit thinks about how her father lost both of his parents to cancer; they died within a year of one another when Robert was in his twenties. She reflects that Robert’s shift to being protective and practical ultimately only served to make him feel safe. Her uncle Jack (not a true uncle, but her father’s best friend) calls with a question for Mandip about Robert’s will, as Jack serves as its executor. He reiterates that Robert’s death was “just a freak thing,” an “empty refrain” that Kit hates (73).

A conversation with Violet’s mother causes Mandip to ask about Kit not sitting with her friends at lunch. She explains that she is not alone; she’s been sitting with David and just needs “a little space” from her friends (75). Mandip teases Kit about finding David “cute.”

David worries that their discussion the day prior will disrupt his nascent friendship with Kit; Miney instructed him to never discuss a girl’s weight, even when she introduces the topic. He is relieved when Kit moves directly to his lunch table. He offers her notes from the classes she missed the day before, which Kit praises for their comprehensiveness, calling them “art.”

Kit shares her Indian food leftovers, and David explains his affinity for cooking. She calls David “good-weird,” which pleases him. She asks him about quantum mechanics, which he views as “fate” (though, unknown to David, this is the topic that Robert had told Kit he’d discussed with David several months prior). José Gutierrez, the “second-smartest kid in school, after [David]” (82), stops by to ask David to join the Academic League for the 28th time. Thinking of the possibility to impress Kit, David agrees.

When Kit offers David a ride home, he agrees, even though his own car is in the parking lot. They discuss quantum physics’ approach to whether “consciousness survives death” (86), which leads Kit to recall her father’s diverse interests. David argues that though it is “comforting” to consider the possibility that her father’s consciousness persists, it “still sucks” that Kit cannot see or speak with Robert (87). Kit comments that David’s “brutal honesty is…bizarrely refreshing” (88).