What Alice Forgot

“Where was Nick? Had he already got up? Maybe he was making her a cup of tea.”

Alice’s confidence that Nick is nearby illustrates the couple’s closeness and happiness at the beginning of their relationship. Her guess that he is making her a cup of tea illustrates Nick’s loving and caring manner towards Alice . Nick is characterized as a caring and sweet husband, which elucidates Alice’s shock when she discovers that they are separated and when Nick swears angrily at her on the phone.

“I just got an invitation to her fortieth birthday.”

Jane tells the paramedic that Alice is in fact 39, not 29. The invitation to Alice’s 40th birthday party, which Alice doesn’t remember issuing, illustrates that it is in fact 2008, not 1998. This sets up the premise of the story, in which Alice struggles to understand the intervening years and to reconcile her old and new selves.

“‘Yes, of course, I’ll call Nick.’ Jane enunciated her words carefully, as if she were acting in a children’s pantomime.”

Jane’s over-enunciated response signals to the reader that she may be humoring Alice because of her head injury and that Nick may not be the person who should be called on Alice’s behalf in 2008. This moment foreshadows Alice’s discover of her fractured relationship with Nick and sets up the stark contrast between the version of Nick that Alice expects and the version of Nick that exists in the present day.

“‘Alice! Are you okay? What happened?’ She had one of those “How now, brown cow accents.”

Kate is characterized as the epitome of the busy, rich, gossipy, and snobbish suburban mother. Her “how now, brown cow” accent refers to a posh Australian accent, delivered with deeper and more accentuated vowels to affect a higher-class way of speaking.

“She longed for Nick. He would be able to fix everything.”

Twenty-nine-year-old Alice—who is shy, disorganized, and easily overwhelmed—relies on Nick, her loving husband, to help and support her. She is surprised to find that her 39-year-old self is self-sufficient and assertive. The changes in Alice reflect the breakdown of their marriage, as well as her maturation into a confident woman and mother.

“The doctor stopped and looked at her. ‘That looks very much like a cesarean scar to me. … Alice stared at her flat stomach—very flat!—and didn’t say anything.’”

Alice’s body has changed in the intervening 10 years. These changes, such as the cesarean scar from Olivia’s traumatic birth, speak to the vast array of experiences she has forgotten. The changes in Alice’s body provide clues about the past 10 years, such as her new interest in fitness and the birth of her children. Her body has also aged in ways that feel shocking and unfamiliar. Alice must adjust to her new body as well as her new life.

“The underwear was creamy lace-edged silk. Alice’s underwear tended to be flippant and faded; jolly seahorses on her pants and purple cotton bras that clipped at the front.”

Alice’s maturity, as well as her and Nick’s changed financial position, is symbolized in her choice of underwear. Her chaotic and playful demeanor as a younger person is symbolized in the “jolly seahorse” emblazoned underwear and the bright colors. Her new underwear is more expensive, chicer, and sexier. This indicates a change in Alice’s preferences for fashion and, possibly, in her sex life.

“There were various credit cards and ATM cards with her name embossed on the front, including a gold American Express card. Wasn’t a gold Amex just a status symbol for the sort of person who drives a BMW?”

Alice is shocked to find a gold Amex card in her wallet; she reflects, derisively, that gold Amex cards are status symbols. Alice at 39 is not only wealthier but is drawn more towards expensive luxury items that denote wealth. She now embodies some of the stereotypes which she used to mock. 

“[P]eople glancing over at traffic lights would see a standard dad ...with his three kids… if I think too much about this it will hurt a great deal, so I won’t”

This comment illustrates Elisabeth’s grief, ongoing trauma, and immense frustration at her and Ben’s inability to have a baby. Elisabeth considers herself responsible for their infertility struggles; she carries guilt and shame about this. It is also evident from this that Elisabeth tries to—unsuccessfully—suppress her unhappiness. 

“It actually felt sort of good to hear Alice cry. It felt real.”

Alice and Elisabeth’s relationship has been strained during the years of Elisabeth’s infertility struggles. Accumulated resentment between the sisters has caused them to treat each other with impersonal politeness much of the time. This is a huge change from their close and loving relationship 10 years earlier. Alice’s crying to Elisabeth on the phone illustrates Alice’s expectation that they are still close. Elisabeth’s relief at hearing Alice cry foreshadows their reconciliation later in the novel.

“‘Oh, Libby, what happened to you?’ I told you, it defines me.”

Alice is shocked to see Elisabeth. Elisabeth’s face, figure, and manner have changed immensely due to the trauma of her infertility and miscarriages: She looks older and profoundly unhappy. In the intervening 10 years, Elisabeth has come to identify with her infertility in a way that shocks Alice, who always knew Elisabeth to be strong and confident.

“He said, ‘Then why the fuck did I need to call you?’”

Alice is shocked, appalled, and saddened by Nick’s rude and abrupt response when he calls her from Portugal. Her shock attests to the immense change in their relationship and the bitterness of their separation. His rudeness alludes to their decision to divorce, and Alice’s devastation foreshadows her determination to repair their relationship.

“It was Alice’s mother standing at the end of her bed, but this was an extraordinarily different Barb Jones from the one Alice knew.”

Alice is shocked that her demure and shy mother arrives at the hospital in a full skirt and theatrical makeup. Her manner is far louder and more confident than Alice remembers. Alice’s shock indicates the extent of the changes Barb has undergone since marrying Roger. In a broader sense, Barb’s changes emphasize how much can change, personally and holistically, in people’s lives over a decade. They emphasize the enormity of the adjustment Alice must make to understand the people and relationships around her in 2008.

“It’s not just Alice being confused. It’s like I’m literally talking to a 29-year-old Alice. Even the way she talks is different. It’s slower and softer and less careful.”

Elisabeth’s observation emphasizes the total regression of Alice’s mental state to a younger version of herself. This elucidates the shock and surprise Alice feels in adjusting to her new surroundings, relationships, and mannerisms. Alice must reconcile the old and new version of herself, and in the end, she uses some characteristics of her younger self to soften many of her opinions and behaviors.

“Don’t you dare get back into bed. You’ll make them late for school again and you’ll never hear the end of it. Alice’s chin jerked up in surprise. Where did that come from?”

Alice’s stern inner monologue shocks her relaxed and sleepy 29-year-old self. Alice’s new harsh and hurried manner attests to the busyness of her life as a mother of three and to the changes which Alice has undergone in the intervening years to ably manage running her household.

“As she stood under the shower and massaged the shampoo into her hair, the fragrant smell of peach filled her nostrils, and it was so entirely familiar her knees buckled. Of course, of course. She made a sound like a strangled sob and remembered herself standing under a pounding shower, steam billowing, resting her forehead against a wall of blue tiles and howling silently while the bubbly lather from the peach-smelling shampoo slipped into her eyes.”

Memories are a recurring motif throughout What Alice Forgot. In this instance, Alice is overwhelmed by a memory Gina’s death. Without context, Alice only has the impression of overwhelming grief. This alludes to the traumatic year Alice has had, in particular the trauma of losing Gina. Her pain over Gina’s death negatively impacts her relationship with both Nick and Madison.

“There was no way this “divorce” talk could be serious. How could they be anything but blissfully happy living in this house?”

Alice and Nick achieved all of the endless tasks on their renovation list and created a beautiful home. Given this, Alice finds their apparent unhappiness inconceivable. Moriarty explores the feelings of resentment that can build up over time in relationships, even if things seem perfect on the surface. She explores the corrosive effects of betrayals, long work hours, and arguments in straining once-happy relationships.

“She pulled out a familiar green summer dress and held it up in front of her. She’d bought it especially for her honeymoon. It was one of the most expensive dresses she’d ever owned. Dry-clean only. Now it had a brown stain on the neckline and a jagged hemline where someone had taken to it with a pair of scissors.”

The changes to Alice’s dress symbolize the passage of time. Unnervingly, Alice can remember none of the events which contributed to its changed state, emphasizing again how much can happen in a decade. The dress’s new status as a dress-up-box item reminds Alice that she is a mother of children, children she does not remember.

“She was stunned by her sanctimonious, contemptuous tone. She scrolled down further and bitter words and phrases jumped out at her. May I remind you … You are so small minded … You are so sanctimonious … You must be out of your mind if you think … What is WRONG with you?”

Alice reads email exchanges between herself and Nick. With no context to understand her resentment of, and anger at, Nick, she is appalled at their tone of their email exchange. She is saddened that both she and Nick have become enemies because it is so out of character with the relationship she remembers.

“I could find a long empty stretch of road with an appropriate telephone pole … and I could drive at it very fast.”

Elisabeth’s suicidal ideation illustrates the extent of the grief and trauma she experienced in her six miscarriages. Her pregnancy makes her feel terrified that she will need to relive this; even her hope for a positive result is not enough to stop her from fantasizing about the worst possible outcome. She has come to define herself by her infertility so much that she is afraid to go against fate.

“[C]ome home now and be Mum’s husband again … I’m pretty sure then I would stop being angry.”

Madison is characterized as troubled and angry. It is revealed in this conversation that her anger is rooted in Nick and Alice’s separation and ongoing divorce proceedings, which she finds stressful. Since Madison is the oldest, Alice and Nick treat her as more adult than her siblings, and that means that Madison feels an emotional responsibility for the divorce even though she is a child.

“George was lying on his side, as if he’d been kicked over. His once dignified lion’s face was now stained a moldy green, which made him look ashamed, as if he were an old man with food all over his face … Mildred was sitting in the middle of a pile of old pots. There was a huge chip out of one paw, and she looked sad and resigned.”

George and Mildred, the lion statues Alice and Nick playfully personified and joked about early in their relationship, are neglected and damaged. Their state symbolizes the damage which has occurred in Nick and Alice’s relationship. Alice determinedly thinks that, like the lions, the marriage will have to be worked on to be returned to its former glory.

“Nick was in the UK for two weeks. He only called twice. Twice in two weeks. He was too busy, he said. He was distracted. But they won the account! He got the bonus! We can afford a swimming pool!”

Nick’s prioritization of his work over his family, in Alice’s eyes, caused resentment to build between them. She felt isolated and stressed raising the children without his support. This was the beginning of their marriage troubles and remained the main issue they clashed about in the custody dispute.