52 pages • 1 hour read
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During therapy, Ellie describes feelings of dissociation and her inability to feel a sense of self. Cerise suggests that they do some art therapy rather than talking, which interests Ellie. Cerise asks Ellie to draw what friendship looks like to her. In one of the drawings, Ellie draws a field with a hole that looks like a grave. In the other picture, Ellie draws four girls with loops around their wrists. Cerise asks if the people are real, and Ellie starts having a panic attack. Cerise talks her through it. Ellie tells her that the people in the picture were her friends but also her sisters.
At the station, one of the officers tells Chelsey that they did not find any evidence at Lewis’s house of either Gabrielle or Ellie. Once Lewis’s lawyer shows up, Chelsey informs her about the blood on Gabrielle’s sweatshirt being a partial match to Lewis’s father.
In a flashback, David tells Serendipity, Hope, Charity, and Ellie that he knows they have betrayed him. Michael dumps the seeds on the ground, and Ellie feels afraid. David makes the girls throw the seeds into the fire, followed by the friendship bracelets that Hope made for them. Ellie blacks out from fear but wakes up in a room with David, Michael, and one of the compound’s new puppies, which Ellie calls Star. David tells her that Hope and Charity told him that the seeds were Ellie’s idea and that the other girls only pretended to be her friends. Ellie feels overwhelmed with loneliness. Ellie blurts out that Hope found the seeds but that it was Ellie’s idea to plant them. She begs David not to hurt Hope. Before she can react, David locks her in the room, and she hears him attack Hope. Ellie pushes the bed against the wall to peer out the window. She sees Michael dragging Hope toward the car, followed by the dogs. Michael drives away with Hope as Star comforts Ellie.
Chelsey interviews Lewis Salt. She finds out that Lewis has a daughter named Willa who went missing when she was seven. Chelsey starts doubting her original idea that Lewis is the perpetrator, and she wonders if the DNA match on the sweatshirt is to Willa, not Lewis. Chelsey tells him that she believes that Willa is one of the victims of the man who took Gabrielle and Ellie. Chelsey lets Lewis go and finds a picture of Willa, wondering why Ellie would not tell her about Willa.
After David kills Hope, he keeps Ellie in her room. Serendipity brings Ellie food and gives her Hope’s clothes. Ellie hugs Hope’s University of Washington sweatshirt to her as she begs Serendipity to help her escape. However, Serendipity tells Ellie that she owes everything to David and that she will not betray him. David interrupts them, and Serendipity leaves. David tells Ellie that Hope’s death should show Ellie that his love for the girls has limits and that he will not let them trick him again.
In the middle of the night, Ellie wakes up to a girl screaming. Ellie realizes that another girl must be trapped in the bus. A few days later the screaming stops, and Michael shoves the new girl into the bunker. The girl panics, but Ellie calms her down by giving her Hope’s sweatshirt to wear and wiping her cuts with it. Ellie tells the girl a story and takes her into her room to rest. The girl tells Ellie that she is seven years old. For the first time, Ellie does not want to escape; instead, she wants to protect the girl from David. The girl tells Ellie that David said her new name was Grace but that her real name is Willa. Ellie tells her never to say her old name again.
Chelsey feels desperate to talk to Ellie about Willa because she believes that Willa is still alive. She texts Ellie that she needs to talk to her, but Ellie makes up an excuse to avoid her, which makes Chelsey suspicious. Chelsey drives to Cerise’s office and explains the situation regarding Willa. In light of this news, Cerise shows Chelsey the picture that Ellie drew of the girls in the field.
Danny visits Ellie, who asks him to take her to the place where she was found. Danny feels uneasy about this, but he drives her to the location. Ellie says that she wants to walk around by herself but promises Danny that she will text him every few minutes so that he knows that she is safe. Danny takes her phone—ostensibly to check that she has service, but actually to turn on the Find My Friends app. Danny covertly follows her in the woods and finds her digging. She pulls a small package from the hole and tucks it into her waistband. Danny returns to the car, and when Ellie comes back, she says that she does not know who she is anymore. She tells him that people used to call her Destiny and that she finds it hard to respond to her real name. Danny wonders if the name the abductors called Ellie is a clue to where they kept her.
Desperate to speak with Ellie, Chelsey calls Kat and tells her to bring Ellie to the station the following morning for a final round of questions. After the call, Chelsey wonders about who Lydia would have become if she had lived.
Ellie feels renewed with Grace by her side. One day, David overhears Grace complaining about the meat he gave the girls. Ellie gets between them, but she knows that David will only punish Grace more violently if she continues to get in the way. Ellie gives Grace to Michael even though Grace screams for her. After Michael drags Grace away to lock her in one of the rooms, Charity tells Ellie that she did the right thing. Charity also warns Ellie about becoming too attached to Grace. Ellie knows that her love for Grace is dangerous, but she does not know how else to survive.
Chelsey invites Ellie into a conference room. Chelsey tells Ellie about the blood on the sweatshirt being a match for Willa Adams and then shows her a picture of Gabrielle and Hannah Johnson, another girl who went missing and was last seen getting into a blue station wagon. Chelsey tells her about Lydia and how she always wishes she could go back and save her. She asks Ellie to help her save Hannah and Willa. Ellie breaks down and tells Chelsey that Hannah is dead but that she does not know where her body is. She tells Chelsey that Willa is alive and that she will always keep Willa safe, and Chelsey tells Ellie that she wants to help her do this. Ellie wants to go home but says that if Chelsey comes over to her house tomorrow, she will tell her everything. As she leaves, Ellie asks Chelsey what happened to Lydia, and Chelsey tells her about how Oscar killed her. Chelsey promises Ellie that they will find the person who hurt Ellie and thanks Ellie for helping with the investigation.
Ellie’s sessions with Cerise continue to serve as a vehicle to explore her character development as well as The Psychological Impact of Trauma. Ellie’s art therapy reveals that Gabrielle, Hannah, and Willa are the most important things in Ellie’s mind. Due to their mutual trauma, Ellie feels bonded to them, thinking of Willa as her little sister. However, her love for the other girls is hard to disentangle from the circumstances in which she came to know them. For example, Ellie’s guilt over Gabrielle’s death threatens to consume her until she bonds with Willa, at which point the feeling morphs into an obsession with keeping Willa alive to atone for how she “betrayed” Gabrielle. The repercussions of this ripple into the present: Ellie feels consumed by guilt over what West is forcing her to do to protect Willa, which is why she has a panic attack when she thinks about it. One of the primary effects of Ellie’s trauma, then, is to exacerbate The Complexities of Home by rendering the compound a place of both friendship and abuse.
This is something that Ellie’s captors understand and use to their advantage. For example, West convinces Ellie to tell him who was responsible for the seed idea by mentioning that Hannah and Gabrielle do not like her. The inherent precarity of her situation makes Ellie more willing to believe this than she might otherwise be, and she crumbles and looks to the only other friend she believes she has: her own captor. Nor is this the only way that West and the others undermine the girls’ solidarity. West forcing the girls to burn their friendship bracelets symbolizes his efforts to drive a wedge between them. It also reveals his intention to destroy their sense of identity, which has become bound up in their relationships with one another. Meanwhile, the destruction of the seeds themselves undermines the girls’ free will on the most basic level, denying them bodily autonomy.
Chelsey’s confession to Ellie about her guilt over Lydia’s death also furthers the novel’s exploration of trauma’s lasting impact, revealing how it can undermine judgment. Initially suspicious about Ellie not wanting to help with the investigation, Chelsey begins to believe in her innocence once they bond over Willa and Lydia. In one sense, Chelsey is right about her connection to Ellie: Ellie certainly understands the feeling of wanting to protect the people she loves. However, Chelsey is too wrapped up in her own guilt over Lydia to notice the particularities of Ellie’s situation—for instance, the fact that Ellie’s disinterest in the case foreshadows the explanation of how exactly Ellie managed to “escape.” This misunderstanding goes both ways. Rather than understanding Chelsey’s story as an opportunity to confess what she knows about West, Ellie interprets it as an indicator of why she cannot fail in her mission to bomb the governor: Ellie knows that she cannot live with the guilt of another person’s life on her conscience—especially not Willa’s. Although Hannah has warned Ellie that her love for Willa is dangerous, Ellie clings to it because Willa gave Ellie hope when she thought that she would never feel hope again. The way in which Chelsey and Ellie, who have so much in common, end up at cross purposes echoes the dynamic between Ellie and the other captured girls, underscoring trauma’s ability to both unite and divide.