The Breakdown

On Thursday, Cass begins hanging up on the silent caller immediately after answering. He calls repeatedly until she gives up and listens to the silence long enough to satisfy him. When she tells Matthew about it, he seems fed up and dismisses her concerns. The sound of a car peeling out in front of the house makes Cass think it had been sitting there, watching. She leaves in fear and goes shopping in Castle Wells, where she runs into her friend Connie. When Cass apologizes for missing Connie’s party at the beginning of the summer (the night of Jane’s murder) Connie mentions that John wasn’t there either.

When she’s ready to go home, Cass can’t find her car in the parking garage. She’s sure she parked on level four, but she checks levels two, three, and five just to be certain. She tells the attendant her car was stolen, but he doesn’t believe her. When she tries to show him, she finds her car where she left it. The continued toll of questioning her sanity leaves Cass shaken and extremely depressed.

Cass receives a letter from Jane’s husband, Alex, thanking her for the kind card she sent. She decides to tell Matthew her theory about Jane’s killer being her tormentor. If he believes it’s possible, she’ll tell the police. While waiting for Matthew to finish work, Cass runs into John, and they have lunch together. He says he’s been having a rough time since his girlfriend “disappeared off the scene” (155). Cass confides in John about her fears of having dementia. He’s understanding and kind.

After lunch, on a whim, Cass drives to the village where Jane lived. She sits on a bench at the park and realizes that Jane’s husband is there with their twin daughters. He talks to her a bit, but she doesn’t reveal who she is or that she knew Jane. Cass gets home at 5 o’clock that evening but is too afraid to go inside, so she waits in the car until Matthew gets home at 6:30 pm. Matthew talks about meeting their new neighbor, a retired pilot whose wife recently left him. Matthew suggests that they have him over for dinner sometime.

Cass calls Rachel, who’s on vacation in Siena, and they arrange to have lunch the day after she gets back, which is the day before school starts. Cass still has an enormous amount of work left to prepare for the term. Matthew books them a couples’ spa appointment for the afternoon, but they’re running late, so he takes the Blackwater Lane shortcut. Cass panics and tries to get out of the car while it’s going 40 kph. Matthew stops the car right where Jane died, pushing Cass to hysterics. Matthew takes her home and has Dr. Deakin come by. The doctor says Cass should be taking the pills he prescribed consistently, rather than only as needed. When she finally calms down, Cass tells Matthew she’s stressed about school starting and not sure she can get prepared in time. He suggests that she ask to work part-time.

Since Dr. Deakin’s visit, Cass has been taking two pills every night and two every morning. They make her so sluggish that she spends her days drifting between wake and sleep. She’s unable to drive, has no appetite, and is no longer returning calls or emails from her friends and coworkers. She can’t remember how to work the microwave. Things she doesn’t remember ordering from the shopping channel keep arriving. She forgets to attend the teacher’s planning meeting but tells Matthew she skipped it because she decided not to go back to work. Cass’s boss, Mary, comes by the house, and Matthew learns that Cass hasn’t returned any of Mary’s, Connie’s, or John’s calls. Cass blames the pills but says she doesn’t want to reduce the dose.

Cass doesn’t take her pills during the day on weekends because she doesn’t want Matthew to see how doped-up they make her. She forgets her lunch date with Rachel, who comes by to check on her. Rachel’s concern increases when she sees how Cass looks. She urges Cass to accompany her on her work trip to New York, but Cass can’t handle the thought of getting on a plane or even leaving the house. That night, Cass admits to Matthew she can’t remember how to work the washing machine. He shows her a letter from Dr. Deakin saying she may have early-onset dementia and needs to schedule testing. This news makes Cass feel like she’s lost her last bit of hope.