The Boy, the Mole, the Fox and the Horse

“‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ [the mole asked]. ‘Kind,’ said the boy.”

This line establishes the way the subversion of expectations will characterize the language of the text. The boy’s childlike unexpected answer creates a sense of innocent wisdom and highlights how the book will address life’s big questions and near-universal values.

“‘What do you think success is?’ asked the boy. ‘To love,’ said the mole.”

This time, the mole provides an unexpected answer to the boy’s question. People often define success as having lots of money, a job that they find stimulating, and a fulfilling personal life. However, for the mole, success is something much simpler, and it is a similarly beautiful and unanticipated response to one of life’s common questions.

“‘Do you have a favourite saying?’ asked the boy. ‘Yes,’ said the mole. ‘What is it?’ ‘If at first you don’t succeed, have some cake.’”

The mole’s unexpected and humorous response to a lack of success foreshadows his claim that our greatest freedom is in being able to choose our reactions. Usually, the beginning of the mole’s favorite saying ends with the words “try, try again.” However, the mole espouses a very different response to setback: eating cake. Although it is comical, it highlights the idea that we don’t have to “deserve” our favorite things. We should partake of what we enjoy in whenever, not just in celebration but, perhaps, most especially when we feel disappointed.

“‘What do you think is the biggest waste of time?’ [asked the boy]. ‘Comparing yourself to others,’ said the mole.”

This wisdom of avoiding comparisons like this is more well-worn and, thus, likely more expected by readers, though perhaps many wouldn’t identify it as the “biggest” time waster. A similar common maxim goes, “Comparison is the thief of joy,” and mole seems to be of the same opinion. The mole, horse, and boy will eventually recognize one’s inherent and unique significance in the world, so lamenting that someone else is smarter or faster or more sophisticated than one does nothing to indicate one’s own individual abilities and contributions.

“Most of the old moles I know wish they had listened less to their fears and more to their dreams.”

Here the story expresses another common idea: that those with a great deal of life experience regret the time wasted on fear in their youth. The book argues that listening to one’s fear—perhaps that one doesn’t measure up to others—can keep one from pursuing one’s dreams or from being authentic and forming real, emotional connections with others. It can be difficult for those who are still young to follow this advice, though the boy and the mole certainly try and are richly rewarded for the effort.

“Imagine how we would be if we were less afraid.”

The mole encourages the boy not to fear the wild, suggesting that their experience will be better and more fulfilling if they refuse to be afraid. The mole’s genuine effort to live fearlessly is immediately tested when he and the boy find the ensnared fox. His belief that life will be more rewarding in the absence of fear foreshadows his claim regarding the significance of The Freedom to Choose Our Reactions, as fearful responses can lead to very different outcomes from compassionate ones.

“I’ve learned how to be in the present […] I find a quiet spot and shut my eyes and breathe […] Then I focus [on] cake.”

The mole tells the boy how to remain mindful and calm, and he does it—in part—by fixing his attention on something he loves. This is similar to the advice the horse gives later about surviving life’s storms; he says to concentrate on what one loves, and this is precisely what the mole does when he needs to ground himself in the present.

“Isn’t it odd. We can only see our outsides, but nearly everything happens on the inside.”

As the boy and mole look at their reflections in the water, the boy points out this dichotomy: that the most significant things happen inside us and are therefore unseen, while the smallest and least significant things happen outside ourselves, and only those are visible. This is what makes it easier to hide one’s weaknesses or vulnerabilities than to reveal them and why it requires such daring to be open.

“Being kind to yourself is one of the greatest kindnesses.”

The mole feels that kindness to oneself is, perhaps, the greatest because when we are kind to ourselves, we need not wait for others to offer us kindness. While emotional connection with others has a lot of value, loving oneself is just as important, if not more so. The characters will continue to affirm this idea throughout the narrative.

“Often the hardest person to forgive is yourself.”

The mole also offers this bit of wisdom. One knows oneself best, especially because only the individual can know all that goes on inside themselves. As the boy and the fox both demonstrate through their speech, we are often hardest on ourselves even when we can give unwavering support and love to others.

“‘Doing nothing with friends is never doing nothing, is it?’ asked the boy. ‘No,’ said the mole.”

The friends’ realization that having fun and playing with one’s friends isn’t nothing belies the common misconception that we have to be productive or goal-oriented to be doing “something” of significance. Doing “nothing” with friends brings us closer, building trust and comfort, and—given The Value of Friendship to impact our lives and self-awareness for the better—this is certainly not “nothing.” It is a very significant something.

“Tears fall for a reason and they are your strength not weakness.”

Because we often associate tears with sadness, grief, or disappointment, they are common symbols of weakness. The horse, however, makes the opposite claim, linking them to strength. This is because it is so hard to admit that we are flawed and imperfect when we look around and see others who seem so flawless.

“‘What is the bravest thing you’ve ever said?’ asked the boy. ‘Help,’ said the horse.”

Contrary to popular belief, perhaps, the horse argues that asking for help is “the bravest” thing a person can do. When one asks for help, they admit a vulnerability or weakness—which is so difficult to do sometimes—and the asking shows that they haven’t, in fact, given up but are working to exhaust all possibilities for success. Asking for help demonstrates courage and commitment, not resignation or hopelessness.

“‘We all need a reason to keep going,’ said the horse. ‘What’s yours?’”

In asking this question, the horse acknowledges the importance of recognizing which things (or people) one loves most. By suggesting that each of his three friends might have a unique reason for carrying on, he acknowledges that we often love different things and that these things are all valid. That the fox, the mole, and the boy ultimately select very similar answers suggests how well suited they are as friends.

“‘Nothing beats kindness,’ said the horse. ‘It sits quietly beyond all things.’”

Many characters identify kindness—to others and to oneself—as one of the most important qualities someone can have. The horse personifies kindness as something that can choose to be quiet and is naturally unassuming, something that “sits […] beyond” everything else. This seems to suggest that kindness is the ultimate quality one can possess.

“Sometimes just getting up and carrying on is brave and magnificent.”

The horse often acknowledges that the things we typically associate with weakness are really signs of strength, that just getting out of bed sometimes requires courage, especially when life is hard. He says it is “magnificent” when a person chooses to carry on rather than give up, and this makes him a wonderful, supportive presence to the others.

“‘The greatest illusion,’ said the mole, ‘is that life should be perfect.’ My dog walked over the drawing—clearly trying to make the point.”

The mole identifies the idea of perfection as the biggest misconception one can have. The illustration on the same page is mottled and marred in ways no other page is; Mackesy writes at the bottom that his dog walked through the drawing, messing it up a little. He suggests that his dog’s actions prove the mole’s point, that nothing is perfect, and we shouldn’t expect perfection of others or ourselves.

“Life is difficult but you are loved.”

The horse acknowledges the boy’s pain and reassures him of their love for him. He doesn’t say that life is hard “and” we love you but, rather, that life is hard “but” we love you. This makes it sound like the love the boy’s friends bear him outweighs and ultimately overpowers life’s difficulties. The horse doesn’t downplay the boy’s feelings about or perceptions of his life, but he does use a reassuring conjunction to highlight how love is more significant than life’s challenges.

“‘Well we love you whether you can fly or not,’ [said the boy].”

Other horses grew jealous of the horse’s unusual ability to fly, so he stopped doing it even though it gives him joy and though his wings are part of him. With his real friends—those who value, support, and accept him completely—he is empowered to be himself. The boy’s words indicate the group’s acceptance of the horse, regardless of what he can or cannot do, demonstrating The Value of Friendship.

“‘We don’t know about tomorrow,’ said the horse, ‘all we need to know is that we love each other.’”

Often, we fear an unknown future, and the horse acknowledges that we cannot know what’s to come. However, he says that if the group of friends knows that they love one another, they have the emotional security they need to face whatever comes. Again, this foregrounds The Value of Friendship to ground us and help provide a more manageable perspective on life’s trials and unknowns.

“‘We have such a long way to go,’ sighed the boy. ‘Yes, but look how far we’ve come,’ said the horse.”

When the mole asks the boy if he sees his glass as half-empty or half-full, the boy says he’s just grateful to have a glass. But when it comes to finding “home,” the boy is more easily discouraged. The horse offers gentle support to help reframe the boy’s perception so that he can choose a different, more empowered and hopeful response. When the boy laments how far they still have to go, the horse encourages him to look how far they’ve already come together.

“‘What do we do when our hearts hurt?’ asked the boy. ‘We wrap them with friendship, shared tears and time, till they wake hopeful and happy again.’”

In the horse’s response to the boy’s question, he personifies the heart. When the heart is hurt, he says, we wrap it in friendship, a metaphor that compares friendship to a warm blanket or even a hug. He suggests that our hearts can feel “hopeful and happy again” after they’ve been reminded of the kindness and love of friends.

“‘I’ve realized why we are here,’ whispered the boy […] ‘To love,’ said the boy. ‘And be loved,’ said the horse.”

The boy here encapsulates the book’s underlying message: that love is the purpose of existence. They live to love each other, certainly, but also to accept the love of others, as the horse points out. This understanding, including the recognition that being loved is as central to our health and happiness as loving, underwrites all the wisdom the characters share.