That's Not What Happened

After meeting Kellie, Lee wants to talk to Miles. She drives to a party that Miles, Denny, and Amber are attending. Peter McHale, Sarah’s cousin, and Tara Chambers threaten her as she enters. Lee sinks to the ground in a panic attack. Denny, Amber, and Miles tell the harassers to leave. Miles escorts Lee back to her truck and drives her home. After she recovers, Lee tells Miles he was right about Kellie not wanting to tell the truth. She admits to being obsessed with the project and apologizes for harassing him with it. Miles reminds her that her project accomplished good things, such as Eden’s plan for recovery. He surprises her with his letter, handwritten on notebook paper.

Miles’s letter reveals significant truths Lee did not know: Miles feels that he took no heroic actions that day and that Coach Nolan’s death was his fault. Miles moved to town as a troubled teenager from his parents’ neglect and drug use, but Coach Nolan made it clear he thought Miles had potential as a student. On the day of the shooting, a boy in Coach Nolan’s class smarted off about Miles’s parents’ drug addiction, and Miles punched him. Coach Nolan was escorting Miles to the office when the shooter opened fire. Coach Nolan was shot in the hall. Miles turned to run and tripped over Ashley, falling on her and playing dead. Ashley assumed he was protecting her and told everyone Miles was a hero. Miles’s letter mentions how he has liked Lee since moving there. He worries that Lee will hate him for hiding the truth. He also details how Ashley convinced him to write the letter and closes by saying he hopes it “wasn’t a huge mistake” (296).

Lee goes to Miles’s house immediately. She embraces and kisses him as soon as he opens the door. They agree to see each other the next day.

Lee works on her letter before driving to California for college. Miles plans to travel with her, help her settle, and then fly home. Lee does not know what the future holds for them, but she thinks, “It’ll be okay. We’ll both be okay. We’ve survived worse, after all” (300).

Lee shares a portrait of Coach Nolan. In it, she tells how he gave her a C on a paper in history but took the time to annotate it with comments for improvement. Her next paper was an A-. Lee calls him the kind of teacher who saw how each student could succeed.

Lee recalls going with Miles and Denny to their spot in the woods after graduation and admitting she does not know what to do with the collected letters. Denny suggests that writing a letter may help. Now, her letter is complete. Lee realizes a key lesson: “It’s not my decision. I shouldn’t be the one making the choice about what to do with these letters. But I think I know who should” (307).

The text of Kellie’s letter follows. She explains that Lee and Miles met her on their way to California to give her a USB drive. Lee explained the letters and told Kellie it was up to her to decide what to do with the compilation, since Kellie’s story was the most silenced. Kellie forgot about the USB drive until just before the fourth anniversary of the shooting when she saw the McHales’ book at a checkout. The checker praised it as inspirational. Kellie bought the book. She received an email from Ashley Chambers on the anniversary, apologizing for her role in the false narrative and hoping she was doing okay. Kellie deleted the email, then read the book, which infuriated her; she recalled the USB drive. After reading the compilation, she decided to write a letter.

Kellie then explains the day of the shooting from her perspective. She was avoiding class and smoking; witnessed Lee, Sarah, and Ashley in conversation; and knew immediately what the popping sounds were. She fell trying to get into a stall, and her cross necklace, which she purchased at age seven and wore daily, fell to the floor. When the shooter came in, she prayed. When a shot ricocheted off the wall and hit her shoulder, she fell out of the stall. When the shooter found the necklace and demanded to know whose it was, she said it was hers. When he asked if she thought “Jesus is watching over you right now” (321), she answered yes, hoping it might keep her alive. He then turned, fired at Sarah and Lee, and left. Later, Kellie asked Detective Jenner for her necklace, but he told her it was still in evidence. She tried to correct the “Sarah story” in the weeks that followed, but no one listened. The harassment against her family drove them from town.

Kellie closes the letter by saying she understands why Lee left it to her to decide the fate of the compilation. She realizes now that some people will be hurt no matter whether she takes it public or not, but she appreciates the chance to “have power over [her] story” (324). Her last line indicates that the reader knows her decision.