Middle School, The Worst Years of My Life

Miller the Killer catches Rafe at his locker and throws him to the ground. This time he complains that Rafe is behaving himself. When his Operation R.A.F.E. notebook falls on the floor, Miller snatches it. He tells Rafe he can only get the notebook back if he pays one dollar per page until he buys the whole thing back.

Rafe goes through four elaborate fantasies (illustrated on 137-39) about how he can destroy Miller and regain his property. Ultimately, he decides to pay Miller off.

He says, “I had to face the facts: Miller had me, and I was going to spend the rest of sixth grade buying back that stupid notebook, one page at a time” (140). Leo, reminds Rafe that he has only one life left in Operation R.A.F.E.

Georgia discovers and confronts Rafe while he takes cases of Zoom out from Bear’s secret stash. Georgia threatens to tell Jules. He buys her off with some cola, which she is not supposed to have.

Rafe refers to the period between Thanksgiving and Christmas as the “Dark Ages” because the days are darker. Also, he faces a series of Wednesday detentions with Mrs. Donatello. She continues to encourage him to express what he is feeling, though he successfully resists.

Rafe returns to selling Zoom. Rafe says, “Even though I felt like I was still living in the Dark Ages, nobody seemed to notice. As far as Mom, and Jeanne, and even Donatello were concerned, I’d already turned over a whole new leaf” (149). He says that Leo tells him he’s getting what he deserves because normal is boring.

Jeanne approaches Rafe on Monday before Thanksgiving and praises him for beginning to play by all the rules. He says, “I’m on a break […]. I’m just being normal for a while” (152).

She asks him what he’s doing after school Wednesday. He hopes she will ask him to go out with her. Instead, she asks him to participate in a fundraiser to provide food for a family for their Thanksgiving meal. He jumps at the opportunity, knowing it will let him spend time with Jeanne.

When Rafe arrives at the Duper Market, he must wear a large orange outfit, the Hills Village High School mascot: a falcon with wings, a yellow beak, and a superhero cape. The mask covers his head so no one knows who he is. Rafe goes onto the sidewalk in front of the store and flaps his wings, jumping around and handing out flyers. People honk and point at him. Rafe has fun doing something worthwhile.

Afterward, Jeanne praises and thanks him. Rafe asks her if she would like to go and get some pizza. Things crash suddenly when Jeanne tells him she is going with some other kids, which he takes to mean popular kids. She tells him that she really does appreciate it. Rafe says, “I may have been dressed like a falcon, but I’ll tell you what. I felt like the biggest thing Thanksgiving turkey in the world” (161).

Because he knows report cards will come over the Christmas break, Rafe waits outside for the letter carrier. On the third day, he gets an envelope from HVMS, which he takes to his room. Inside the report card is a letter from Mrs. Stricker, who wants to schedule a conference to discuss Rafe’s grades.

Rafe decides to get rid of the report card, in which he had 1C, 3Fs, and 3Ds. He goes to a construction zone where there is a small stream running. He builds a little fire and burns the report card and letter. He smooths the ground, so it looks like nobody has been there.

This chapter is simply an illustration of Rafe, Georgia, Jules, and Bear with happy looks on their faces as they stand before a beautiful Christmas tree and stockings stuffed with goodies. Everybody looks content, apart from Bear, who appears grumpy.

Rafe confesses that the previous illustration was what he wished Christmas would have been. Actually, it was not that way at all. Jules bought gifts from Georgia and Rafe for Bear and gifts for the children, supposedly from Bear. Rafe says, “Then Christmas was over. And then Mom found out about my grades, and the hard stuff started all over again” (169).

Rafe comes into the kitchen to find his mother at the computer looking at the HVMS website. His grades are on the monitor. Jules asks why his grades are so poor, and Rafe replies that they are teaching him the wrong subjects. Bear continually intrudes in the conversation, saying, “[…] [Y]our mother’s been way too easy on you for too long. Those days are over” (171). Rafe’s grades sadden Jules, who says there must be a change. The conversation devolves into an argument in which Bear and Rafe insult one another. To Rafe’s dismay, his mother does not back him up. Instead, she says Bear must check Rafe’s homework every day. Rafe had always thought his mother was his one trustworthy person.

When Rafe returns to HVMS, he finds Miller waiting. He tells Rafe that the price per page of his book is now $1.50. He threatens to tell Jeanne about all the pictures Rafe drew of her. Miller turns and high-fives one of his buddies, infuriating Rafe, who jumps onto Miller’s back. When he cannot shake Rafe off, Miller slams into the wall backward, and Rafe falls to the floor. Students shout, “Fight, fight, fight” (176). Mrs. Stricker appears and stops the fight. Miller pretends he is entirely innocent, saying Rafe is the aggressor. Both boys go to the vice principal’s office.

Rafe fantasizes he is a prisoner in a jail tied to a chair and that the person interrogating him is “Sergeant Ida P. Stricker, the biggest, baddest, meanest guard in this whole joint. And the P stands for pain” (179). He fantasizes that she is an interrogator, formerly a cage fighter. In his fantasy, Stricker refers to him as someone with the potential to be the littlest hoodlum ever sent up to the federal penitentiary. In his imagination, she slugs him three times and knocks him out.

After spending most of the day in the homework room, Rafe hears he must go to Mrs. Stricker’s office, where “they” are waiting. He wonders who “they” are and discovers his mother is present. For 45 minutes, they lecture him on his behavior. They talk to him, send him out, and bring him back: “I was starting to feel like a human yo-yo” (183). The adults announce he is going to get an in-school suspension. Mrs. Donatello will tutor him on Tuesdays and Thursdays. He will have a peer tutor as well, Jeanne.

When Rafe and his mother go home, Jules tells Bear what has happened. Bear says Jules should be harder on him. They have a loud argument before Jules slams the door on her way to work. Left alone in his room, Rafe converses with Leo, who convinces him to restart Operation R.A.F.E.

Later that evening, Rafe tells Bear he must go to the store for poster board to complete a school project. Because he does not trust Rafe, Bear summons Georgia, and all three ride to the office supply store. Alone in the store, Rafe gets some poster board and makes two color copies of his face.

Like all middle school kids, Rafe hates boredom worse than anything else. He says there is no more boring place than the homework room, which has only a window in the door for people to check up on you. He takes the color copy he made of his face, turns it into a mask, and ties it around his head. As he dozes off, Mrs. Stricker opens the homework room door and yells at him: “Rafe Khatchadorian, what in heaven’s name is that supposed to be? Take it off immediately” (194). It surprises him when Stricker takes off his mask, and she breaks into laughter.

Though Rafe adores Jeanne, there is no way he wants her to be his tutor. On their first day of tutoring, he walks past the door of the math room. Jeanne steps into the hall and calls out to him. “Are you trying to blow me off?” (196). He goes in and sits down. They discuss him not really wanting to be there. He decides to allow her to help him.

Rafe pretends he is a sports announcer, narrating his effort to break every rule in the code of conduct book. He questions whether he can pull it off, remarking that Leo the Silent sets down standards for his mischief. Three pages of illustrations (200-02) show Rafe breaking many rules in different parts of the school. Rafe asks, “Will he crash and burn? Or will he go out in a blaze of glory?” (203).

Rafe dreads his Tuesday-Thursday tutoring appointments with Mrs. Donatello. To his surprise, one Tuesday, she has art supplies. She asks if they can just draw. They spend their time drawing until he has to catch his bus. He says, “It was definitely the best not-quite-a-detention I ever had” (205). The teacher compliments him on his wonderful imagination and his drawing skill. Rafe feels tempted to tell her about Leo being his inspiration but keeps it to himself.

Rafe draws close to buying back his Operation R.A.F.E. notebook from Miller. He decides there is another important project. He draws a picture of Miller as a chicken laying an egg with the caption, “It’s Miller the Killer Chicken” (209). He makes 100 black-and-white copies, which he takes to school. Over several class periods, he puts posters in multiple places.

Miller catches up with Rafe in the hallway. Though Miller threatens him, Rafe tells him there is no way he would have done it. Plus, he has $15 to buy more of his workbook back. Miller agrees to meet in the third-floor bathroom in five minutes.

Rafe knows it is quite possible Miller will beat him up. Thus, he’s not surprised when Miller twists his arm around behind him. Rafe protests, saying he did not draw the posters. Miller replies, “Don’t give me that. You draw all the time. It’s all over that little stupid notebook of yours” (214). Rafe convinces Miller that he would never be stupid enough to irritate Miller when he is still trying to get all of his notebook back. Miller says if Rafe figures out who did the posters, he will give him 10 pages free.

Rafe finishes buying the last pages of his notebook. He contemplates how to end Operation R.A.F.E. An idea for the final, grand project comes to him. To get the supplies necessary for the last project, he goes to the office supply store and purchases a heavy-duty black marker with a chisel tip, rolls of masking tape, and stacks of old newspapers. He practices the illustrations he will draw. Leo helps him plan out all the little parts of the drawing. Rafe says, “I was starting to get excited too. As far as I was concerned, the end of Operation R.A.F.E. couldn’t come fast enough” (218).

When Rafe gets his third-quarter grades, they are all just as bad as the previous quarter. He shows his grades to Jeanne: “‘Don’t take it personally,’ I told her. ‘You can’t fix a car if it doesn’t have an engine, right?’ I even knocked on my head like it was hollow, but Jeanne didn’t laugh. She just sat there staring at my grades” (219). Jeanne points out to him that he might have to repeat sixth grade.

There is no title to this chapter, simply a drawing of a nuclear explosion that follows a drawing of a fuse burning down into Rafe’s head as he listens to Jeanne.