I'm Glad My Mom Died

Nonfiction | Autobiography / Memoir | Adult | Published in 2022

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Chapters 7-10Chapter Summaries & Analyses

Chapter 7 Summary

At another television shoot, Jennette is dressed for a show pilot about Depression-era children. Her mother is very excited about this, unlike Jennette. They’ve put a substance on her teeth to make them look dirtier, and it’s uncomfortable. Jennette has been unable to use the bathroom out of fear of being labeled “difficult.” Finally, she asks an adult if she can use the bathroom and apologizes to her mother who wipes her at the toilet. Now eight years old, Jennette has protested that her mother still does this, but she insists. Back on set, the Assistant Director tells Jennette she can go home because she has been used in a “key shot” and now has a principal role in the pilot. She was chosen for her “great sad face” (55), which Jennette’s mother now celebrates, even though she criticized Jennette for not smiling enough earlier. As they drive home, Jennette’s mother tries to push for a “principal performer” spot at Academy Kids for Jennette, but the agency is not yet prepared to offer it. Angry, Jennette’s mother insists that soon enough she will be a star.

Chapter 8 Summary

On the set of the television pilot, Jennette’s mother has gotten the number of Barbara Cameron, a child star agent. She takes Jennette and her brother Marcus to audition for Barbara. Marcus auditions first, and he says it went well, with lots of laughter and talking. Jennette’s audition feels awkward, and she senses that she did not perform how Barbara wanted her to. When she tells her mother that her audition was not like Marcus’ audition, she can tell that she is pretending to not be upset: “That pride and excitement in Marcus is overshadowed by her disappointment in me” (61).

Back at home, Barbara’s agency calls back. Marcus is taken on as a client, but the agency is not interested in taking on Jennette. Unwilling to accept this, Jennette’s mother pushes back, arguing in “a singsong way, like she’s trying to tempt them. It’s such a mismatched tone for a beggar” (62). When the call ends, Jennette’s mother asks her to pray out loud for Barbara’s approval. The phone rings again, and they are informed that Jennette will be accepted as a client if she takes weekly acting lessons. Her mother is relieved and tells Jennette: “You’re a principal actor now, sweetheart. No more background for my baby” (64).

Chapter 9 Summary

Two months into acting class, Jennette hates it. She does not enjoy acting exercises and finds them humiliating. She knows from her mother that she shouldn’t complain because the kids who get auditions are the ones who do what they are told.

Her favorite part of the class is when she must practice memorization because it is the part that doesn’t involve acting or emotions. Her least favorite is the next part, where she must perform in character. She finds it all uncomfortable and does not like other people watching her. While parents are not allowed to be present for this portion of the class, Jennette’s mother insists, citing her previous cancer as a reason why she cannot wait in the car. Jennette writes: “She mouths my lines as I say them and over animates her facial expression when she wants me to mimic it. It’s difficult to perform while navigating Mom’s sideline coaching at the same time” (68). The only relief comes when class ends, and Jennette does not need to look at her lines again until tomorrow.

Chapter 10 Summary

Jennette has landed a part on an episode of MadTV that requires her to use the word “gay,” and she is uncomfortable as a Mormon. Her mother is trying to argue for why the word is okay in certain contexts because Jennette needs to take every role she is offered right now in order to gain Barbara’s approval. At the audition the next day, Jennette reads her lines dutifully. To celebrate, her mother takes her to ice cream. Her mom assumes that she wants Nutty Coconut, which was her favorite flavor when she was younger. Jennette speaks up and says that she would like Cookies and Cream instead. This sends her mother into an emotional spiral about Jennette growing up and changing. Sensing turmoil, Jennette recants. As they eat their ice cream, Jennette’s mother receives a call informing her that Jennette landed the role on MadTV. Excited, she finishes the coconut ice cream, and Jennette is privately happy that she does not have to.

Chapters 7-10 Analysis

These chapters focus on Jennette’s foray into acting and the lengths her mother goes to in order to project her own aspirations onto her daughter. Jennette also goes to extreme lengths in order to please her mother by participating in auditions, acting classes, and television shoots that she profoundly dislikes. As Jennette goes through the motions of advancing her career, it is her mother that is invested in each step forward and every setback. Jennette details the ins and outs of auditions and classes, describing the process of callbacks and monologues and acting exercises with a clinical detachment. The only good thing she has to say about acting classes is that she doesn’t need to practice her lines again until the next day. She is only emotionally invested in her mother’s reactions.

When Jennette relays her mother’s reaction to her disinterest in the Nutty Coconut ice cream flavor, it serves as a symbol of their entire dynamic. The ice cream is meant to be a reward for Jennette, but instead, it becomes another situation where she needs to please her mother. The fact that she wants a different ice cream flavor than usual is an innocuous and natural thing, but her mom reacts with tears. She says that Jennette is growing up, as if it is an accusation. In order to placate her mother, Jennette subsumes her own desires, and by extension, stunts her normal development. Her mom reacts with immediate acceptance and relief, suggesting that she is more interested in Jennette saying and doing what she wants than accepting Jennette as an independent person.