If He Had Been with Me

Finny and Autumn’s homes are next door to each other. Their placement allows Autumn to keep tabs on Finny even when they no longer have a relationship. Both teens feel comfortable going in and out of each other’s homes as though both homes are their own. Their houses become a symbol of their connection. Even when they are no longer close friends, they still visit one another’s homes and see each other’s comings and goings. These homes represent the connection that is always there between them, even when they are not speaking and have different friend groups.

Autumn is an aspiring writer. At the beginning, writing is a hobby Autumn enjoys and considers turning into a career. As her relationship with Jamie becomes serious, he convinces her to put her writing on the backburner as far and to pursue a teaching certificate instead. In this way, writing reflects Jamie’s control over Autumn and her actions. Later, Autumn turns to writing for comfort, making it more of a form of therapy than a hobby. At the end of the novel, Autumn uses her writing to tell Finny how she feels about him. This turns Autumn’s writing into an instrument of expression that goes beyond a hobby or even a career choice.

Finny drives a sports car given to him by his absentee father. The car draws attention to him and his driving, causing him to be pulled over on multiple occasions. When Finny first receives the car, he and Autumn are not talking. She uses the sound of the car’s comings and goings to keep track of Finny; it becomes a symbol of Autumn’s changing feelings and awakening interest in where Finny is and who he spends time with.

When the teens graduate from high school and Jamie breaks up with Autumn, the car becomes a symbol of refuge and the rekindling of Autumn and Finny’s relationship. Finny even attempts to teach Autumn how to drive the car. In the end, however, the car proves to be part of a tragic chain of events that lead to Finny’s death, turning the car into a symbol of tragedy.