Goodbye Days

It’s the day before school starts. Carver decides he is strong enough to handle the “goodbye day” with Nana Betsy and drives to her house to tell her he’ll do it. Once he gets there, though, he chickens out. He drives away again without knocking and hopes she’ll forget about the idea. 

Carver and his parents meet Attorney Jim Krantz. Although no formal charges have been made against Carver, the family wants to be prepared. Mr. Krantz explains Tennessee’s laws regarding criminally negligent homicide. A person can be charged with criminally negligent homicide if they know a certain action has a good chance of harming someone and they do it anyway. In Carver’s case, the key to a criminally negligent homicide conviction would be proving that Carver knew Mars was driving when he texted him. Mr. Krantz instructs Carver not to talk to anybody about the case. Carver learns that his parents anticipate paying $150,000 in legal fees and may need to borrow against the family home.

Before the meeting, Carver has an imaginary conversation about lawyers with Mars. Mars’s dad is a judge (Judge Edwards), and his brother is a lawyer, so he knows what they’re like. At the end of the conversation, Carver asks Mars how he is: “Everything good where you are right now?” (92). Mars is already gone and can’t answer. 

It’s the first day of school. Jesmyn picks up Carver, and they go together, as planned. They talk in the car. While Carver is knowledgeable about writing and books, he doesn’t know much about music. Jesmyn, a pianist, is passionate about music and says she’ll educate him. She invites him to a concert in October by the musician Dearly; she was originally going to go with Eli and has an extra ticket. Carver feels guilty saying yes but agrees to join her.

Inside school, a memorial has been set up for Mars, Eli, and Blake. Carver has a panic attack and collapses in the hallway in front of his classmates, including Eli’s sister, Adair. Jesmyn helps him outside and into the bed of her pickup truck, where he lies down to recover.  

Still lying in the back of Jesmyn’s pickup truck, Carver has an imaginary conversation with Sauce Crew. They tease him about falling down in front of his classmates. Carver calls Georgia to come pick him up, explaining that he had another panic attack. She comes to get him and brings him home, on two conditions. First, he has to tell their parents what’s happened. Second, he has to meet with the therapist she recommended, Dr. Mendez. Georgia makes an appointment for him immediately.

At home, Carver works on his college admission essay but is still hampered by writer’s block. He writes nonsense, spurring from his guilt: “Let me into your college and I promise to try not to kill anybody else with my writing” (124). The possibility that he might go to prison instead of college is also making it hard to write.

After school, Jesmyn and Carver go for a walk. Jesmyn tells him that another boy at school, Alex Bishop, invited her to sit with him at lunch. Carver tells her Alex used to date Adair. Jesmyn thinks that explains why Adair was giving her mean looks at school. Carver assures her that it’s probably also because Jesmyn’s been hanging out with him, since Adair blames Carver for Eli’s death.