Eating Together

Fiction | Poem | Adult | Published in 1986

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Background

Poem Analysis

Themes

Symbols & Motifs

Literary Devices

Further Reading & Resources

Related Poems

“Song of Myself” by Walt Whitman (1856)

Lee has cited Walt Whitman and Emily Dickinson—two renowned American poets—as admired influences. Whitman’s speakers often discard individual personality to embrace the sublimity of the greater whole. Here, “Song of Myself,” is meant to be an anthem for each human being, just as Lee’s poem expresses the universal experience of grief.

“I’m Nobody! Who Are You?” by Emily Dickinson (1891)

Lee’s idea of “nobody-hood” (See: Background) comes from Dickinson’s lyric poem where her speaker privileges the “Nobody” and dismisses the “Somebody” as “dreary” (Line 5) and pompous. In “Eating Together,” Lee’s speaker doesn’t broadcast his personality, trying to embrace the selflessness Dickinson advocates as a way of processing mourning.

“I Ask My Mother to Sing” by Li-Young Lee (1986)

The poem features an “I” in the title and the text, but Lee’s speaker continues their “nobody-hood,” watching his mother and grandmother sing and his father play the accordion, documenting their emotions rather than his own. The poem is an example of how Lee uses poetry to decipher memories.

Further Literary Resources

The Winged Seed: A Remembrance by Li-Young Lee (1995)

Lee’s memoir recounts his family’s battles with persecution and assimilation. Lee addresses the anti-Chinese racism his family confronted in Indonesia, his father’s experiences as a political prisoner, his family’s escape from a prison colony, and what life was like in Chicago, Pennsylvania, and elsewhere. Similar to “Eating Together,” the memoir features deep family bonds, and stresses the deliciousness of the fish head.

Breaking the Alabaster Jar: Conversations with Li-Young Lee edited by Earl G. Ingersoll (2006)

This collection of interviews and discussions features Lee’s background and thoughts on poetry. Lee shares memories and details about his family, and his approach to writing, including his belief in “nobody-hood” and how a depersonalized speaker can create a substantial voice.

“Odd Girl In” by Jenny Zhang (2014)

In this essay for Rookie Mag, Zhang confronts her identity as a Chinese American poet, and the anti-Asian racism she experienced as a child. Using a humorous tone, Zhang shows how she overcame bullying, created a positive identity for herself, and remained connected to her respective Chinese communities.

Listen to Poem

Li-Young Lee reads “Eating Together”

Lee read his poem for Poetry Breaks—a video series that aired in the late 1980s and early 1990s. Lee counters the dispassionate tone of the poem by emphasizing select worlds. Lee also provides his interpretation of the poem, foregrounding the theme of presence versus absence.