Delilah Green Doesn't Care

Delilah is quietly overjoyed to be with Claire again though unsettled at the prospect of emotional dependence. Claire notices that Delilah seems uneasy, refusing to accept her denials. Delilah is relieved, taking this as a sign that Claire knows her true self. Delilah suggests that they go on a date, their first real outing, and takes Claire to the roller-skating rink in the neighboring town. Delilah delights in the ease she feels. They spend the evening in quiet intimacy. After sex, Claire asks if she is always such a romantic with her partners, and Delilah confesses, “I’ve never done this before in my whole life” (294).

The chapter opens from Claire’s point of view. She and Delilah have been enjoying an easy domesticity and including Ruby in their meals and movie nights. Claire dreads Delilah’s return to New York. Ruby tells her that she has been unable to reach Josh on her new cell phone. Claire does her best to reassure her, secretly dreading that he has abandoned them.

Claire and Iris arrive at Astrid’s house, expecting to leave for her bachelorette party. They are shocked to see Astrid screaming at Spencer and hurling his clothes onto her front lawn. Spencer angrily tells Astrid that she should appreciate his ambition to buy a house in Seattle and rescue her from Bright Falls. Astrid goes inside and leaves him behind. Claire and Iris realize that Astrid will need their support and find her in her bedroom. She quietly explains that she never cared for Spencer and that his buying a house without telling her is proof that he is the wrong partner. In tears, Astrid realizes that Spencer always ignored her wishes and that she has no idea how to assert herself in any relationship, especially with Isabel. Claire and Iris promise their unwavering support, and the three friends cry in relief.

Delilah takes an unexpected call from Claire, who tells her about the cancelled wedding. Delilah tells herself that this means she can escape Bright Falls for good. Claire asks Delilah to come support Astrid as she breaks the news to Isabel at Wisteria House. Delilah is doubtful, reminding Claire that her presence makes things “complicated,” to which Claire asks, “And don’t you wish it wasn’t?” (306). Delilah is privately tempted by this vision of community and family and is near tears when Claire promises that she will accompany her in, as she did earlier.

Delilah arrives at the house, trying to maintain her usual distance. Finally, she faces the more complex truth and enters, telling herself, “Not caring was fucking exhausting” (307). She hears Isabel chastising Astrid for her impending social scandal. Astrid, weeping, begs her mother to consider her feelings. She says that both she and Delilah are exhausted from Isabel’s high standards. Incensed, Isabel blames Delilah for the entire situation and criticizes Astrid’s choice to hire her as the photographer. Delilah is overcome by both the confirmation of Isabel’s deep indifference to her and the revelation that Astrid truly wanted her present.

She goes to the upper floor of the house, pausing briefly in her old room and winding up in Astrid’s. Delilah finds a box full of journals going back many years. She opens one from the year of her father’s death. She begins to read and realizes that several entries contain her name. She finds that Astrid was deeply distressed by her inability to get Delilah to spend time with her and even embarrassed that Iris and Claire found the situation confusing. Delilah is stunned by the evidence of a genuine wish for attachment. She finds another entry from high school where Astrid expressed frustration with Isabel and equal frustration that Delilah remained distant. Delilah is near tears when Claire finds her.

As Claire comforts her, Delilah asks her if she remembers her as a child. Claire reluctantly tells her that it was difficult to engage with her, but she understands now that this was a result of Delilah’s personality and trauma, not a character flaw. Inwardly, Delilah wonders if her or Astrid’s memories are reliable. Claire promises her that she will help clarify the situation. Delilah looks at her and realizes that “something pull[s] her to this woman, and she d[oes]n’t want to miss it” (317). She kisses Claire passionately, and Clare breaks the kiss to confess that she wants a real relationship, however logistically complicated it might be. Delilah kisses her back. Before they can say more, Astrid walks in, “her mouth hanging open in shock” (319).

Astrid is furious that Claire has clearly been seeing Delilah without telling her. Iris tries to interject, but Astrid only becomes angrier when Iris reveals that she had some idea the relationship was happening. Astrid points out that they both already concealed their dislike of Spencer. Iris tries to point out that they did try to talk to Astrid about their concerns, but Astrid only becomes more upset when she learns that Delilah was also involved. She turns on her stepsister to say, “[T]wenty-two years of wondering what the hell was wrong with me, what I did, why you wouldn’t give me a chance” (321), to which Delilah interrupts and says that she felt the same rejection.

Astrid points out that she is not her mother, insisting that she has given Delilah every opportunity to care. When Delilah points out that Astrid never mentioned her true feelings, Astrid says simply, “You ignored me first” (322). Delilah tries to tell Astrid that she never meant to hurt her or expected to become involved with Claire, but Astrid refuses to believe that she had no ulterior motive. She reminds Delilah of her earlier bet, shocking both Claire and Iris with the revelation. Delilah struggles to find words to rebut Astrid’s claim, increasing Claire’s doubt and hurt as well as Iris’s.

Claire begins to realize that there may be no future with Delilah, especially since she did not respond to her earlier pleas for a more permanent relationship. Claire sees Delilah as unreliable, like Josh, and refuses Delilah’s wish to say more. Delilah leaves in tense silence as Astrid tells her, “Go ahead and walk away, it’s what you do best” (325).

The narrative resumes two days later from Claire’s perspective. She has been helping cancel wedding vendors from a distance, as neither Astrid nor Iris is speaking to her. Claire is exhausted from this turmoil and the effort of consoling Ruby, who is devastated by Josh’s abandonment. She resists the temptation to call Delilah. Instead, she texts Iris asking to talk, but her friend is already on the way.

To Claire’s surprise, Astrid has accompanied Iris. Ruby has been texting them about Josh’s disappearance. They each embrace and console her. Claire apologizes for her secrecy, claiming that she did not want to add to Astrid’s stress. Astrid, clearly exhausted, tells Claire that she understands there may have been other reasons for her reticence about Delilah. Astrid admits that she has always hesitated to tell anyone the real truth about her desire for a relationship with Delilah. Astrid admits to envying Claire’s emotional significance to Delilah, which she always wanted. Astrid admits that the tension between them is also her doing, as she often failed to grasp Delilah’s unique situation. She explains, “When she pushed me away, I responded in kind, and we just sort of fed off each other like that” (332).

Astrid continues talking, explaining that Spencer seemed a logical choice given everything Isabel had instilled in her about relationships. She always knew that he was not truly the right partner for her, so she avoided Claire and Iris intentionally, knowing they would see the truth. The friends embrace. Iris suggests that their next task should be fixing Claire’s broken heart. Claire denies this, insisting that Delilah does not reciprocate her feelings. Iris asserts that however the bet began, Delilah’s devotion to Claire is obvious. When Claire points out that Delilah did not stay, Astrid admits with unusual generosity that Delilah likely felt like she had no other choice.

Suddenly, Claire receives a barrage of text messages. Josh has been out of town and has newly restored phone service. He realizes that both Claire and Ruby believed the worst of him. Josh arrives, and before he can apologize, Iris punches him in the face. Claire helps him clean up but asserts that she is done giving him chances to be an inconsistent parent. Josh explains that he was finishing his new house in nearby Winter Lake and did not realize that his texts were never sent. He says that he kept the plan a secret because he wanted to show Claire the evidence of his intentions, not merely promise to stay. Ruby arrives and embraces Josh, unsurprised that Iris punched him.

Claire says goodbye to her friends and goes to Winter Lake with her daughter and Josh. She takes in the natural beauty and the impressive cabin Josh has built. He shows her that he has started his own construction business. He tells her that he thinks they should stay platonic coparents, and Claire enthusiastically agrees. Josh surprises Claire by saying that he knows she is in love with Delilah. Claire admits that she is terrified of loving someone only to be left behind, and Josh says that some of this fear is his doing. He tells her, “It’s okay to take something for yourself” (344). While Claire wants to feel optimism, she also acknowledges that Delilah did not choose her.

The narrative shifts to Delilah, now in New York on the evening of her show at the Whitney. She realizes how callous her behavior was, especially the bet, even if it was in the name of self-protection. She looks up at the imposing museum, briefly imagining what it would be like to be there with a partner, especially Claire. At the show, a blond woman, Lorelei, comes up to Delilah—the same woman she slept with at the novel’s opening. Lorelei bought her photograph and showed it to the Whitney’s curators. Delilah thanks Lorelei for her help, and the other woman flirtatiously asks her for a drink. Delilah declines, realizing that she still has feelings for Claire and does not want a casual date.

Later, Delilah sees Astrid surveying a self-portrait she took in Bright Falls of herself submerged in a waterfall. Delilah realizes that she is ready for a more authentic conversation with her, even if it is only to say goodbye. She looks again at her surprising tranquility while under the waterfall and realizes that “she’d found something. She’d been found by someone. Or maybe, by many someones” (353).

Astrid breaks the silence with a confession: She realizes that she always judged Delilah for never visiting Bright Falls, but this is her first visit to New York. Delilah admits that she furthered the distance between them and sincerely apologizes. Astrid accepts and apologizes in turn for refusing to understand Delilah’s struggles. They silently toast to each other, and Astrid views Delilah’s photos. She stops in front of the portrait of 25-year-old Claire, and Delilah remains awed by Claire’s presence and beauty. Astrid asks if Delilah still has feelings for Claire, and when Delilah is too overcome to answer, her stepsister tells her, “Well, I wouldn’t sell that one. I have a feeling there’s someone who might like to see it” (355).

Claire arrives at her empty bookstore just before opening. As she walks through the space, she notices new photographs hanging, all of them of her family and friends during Delilah’s time in Bright Falls. At first, Claire assumes that they are a gift from Astrid and Iris, but then she sees the photo of her younger self in the river and knows that only Delilah could have arranged it. Claire finds Delilah waiting for her in one of the bookstore chairs and asks how the Whitney show went. Delilah, surprised, tells her it went well, and Claire finally asks why she has come back. Delilah says that she came back for the photos but also to see Claire. She then explains that the triumph of her show was less powerful than she expected because Claire was not there with her. She apologizes for leaving and for her cruelty in making the bet. She shows Claire one last picture: the two of them in bed together, laughing. Delilah says that she knows Claire is what she has always truly needed, as she is “someone who’s [her] home” (363).

Claire, brought to tears, asks how they can truly be together given Delilah’s work. Delilah explains that she is willing to be based in Bright Falls, explaining that the community she has found and her recent reconciliation with Astrid have changed her. Claire reminds Delilah that her life is complicated and must always prioritize Ruby. Delilah tells her that she will always respect that, declaring, “I’m putting you first Claire. In case you couldn’t tell, that’s what’s happening here” (365). Delilah asks Claire if she accepts her proposal. Claire, overcome and relieved, kisses her, cementing their shared future.

Delilah enters Stella’s, dressed in her usual tank top and jacket, but this time accompanied by Claire on her arm. They meet Astrid and Iris at a table. Delilah now lives in Josh’s old apartment, socializing regularly with Iris and Astrid. Iris quips that it is exhausting being around Delilah and Claire’s affection, so Delilah responds by kissing Claire. Iris suggests they drink to finding Astrid a new sex partner and points out that she is responsible for Delilah and Claire’s relationship, as she pushed Clare to get Delilah’s number. They tease Claire for not recognizing Delilah then. Astrid insists that she has no desire for a relationship, casual or otherwise. Delilah proposes the final toast, taking her glass and, “tipping it to each of them in turn,” declares, “To us” (370).