83 pages • 2 hours read
Val EmmichA modern alternative to SparkNotes and CliffsNotes, SuperSummary offers high-quality Study Guides with detailed chapter summaries and analysis of major themes, characters, and more. For select classroom titles, we also provide Teaching Guides with discussion and quiz questions to prompt student engagement.
As an assignment from his therapist, Evan writes letters to himself to better express his true feelings. These letters represent his struggle to be his authentic self. He is in constant battle between expressing his true, dark feelings and hiding behind the confident, optimistic attitude he believes his therapist and mom want to see. That internal struggle manifests in the real world when Connor steals one of the letters, which is then mistaken as a suicide note, catalyzing the novel’s main plot. As the lie surrounding this letter grows more complicated, Evan in turns feels more guilty and confused. It’s only after the letter’s origin is exposed that Evan finds internal balance and learns to integrate both his strengths and weaknesses into his true, authentic self.
The summer before his senior year of high school, Evan breaks his arm when he falls out of a tree while working as an apprentice park ranger. His mom encourages him to reach out to his classmates by having them sign his cast. The only person who signs Evan’s cast is Connor, when they meet in the computer lab.
After the cast is removed, Evan often catches himself reaching for his arm, remembering when he fell out of the tree. In Chapter 26 Evan reveals that he really jumped out of the tree, unable to cope with his pain any longer and certain he did not have a positive future waiting for him back on the ground.
At the end of the novel Evan retrieves the cast from under his bed then places it on his arm. After he removes it, he can still see the image of Connor’s name on his arm, and he knows that Connor will always be part of him.
The apple orchard is a symbol of solace and memory. For the Murphys, it represents a happier time, when all four of them recall enjoying a peaceful day together, one of few positive memories they share. Since then, the orchard has closed and fallen into disrepair.
It also further underscores the depth of Evan’s lies. After all, he only comes up with the apple orchard story after seeing the apple bowl on the Murphys’ table. He doesn’t actually know what the orchard looks like since its closure until a photo of the derelict grounds flashes on screen during the fundraising campaign announcement.
Eventually the orchard’s story comes full circle, and it becomes a symbol of redemption. Evan and Zoe meet 20 months after the events of the novel, and Evan apologizes for the pain he caused the Murphy family. Zoe explains that despite everything, the situation really did save them. Evan passes them Miguel’s contact information so they can further keep Connor’s spirit alive, with the help of the friend who knew him best.
Evan’s medication is a motif used to indicate Evan’s overall mood. Throughout the novel, Evan reaches for his bottle of Ativan when he is struck with anxiety. He feels his medication differentiates him from his classmates, and he often claims that he is the only one at his high school taking medication. Since one of the novel’s major themes is that no one is alone, though our struggles often go unspoken, this is likely a faulty assumption.
Evan struggles to feel seen by his parents. After divorcing Evan’s mother, Evan’s father moves to Colorado to start a new family. Mrs. Hansen cares deeply for Evan, but she is often rushing away to work at the hospital. Meanwhile, Evan finds the attention and acceptance he needs through the Murphy family.
Evan fills a similar void for the Murphys. After Connor’s death, Mrs. Murphy gifts Evan a tie, and Mr. Murphy gives Evan a baseball glove, both unused items that formerly belonged to Connor. The items represent the dreams that Mr. and Mrs. Murphy held for Connor. Mrs. Murphy purchased the tie thinking Connor would need to wear it to bar mitzvahs when he started middle school, though he was never invited to a single one. Mr. Murphy purchased the baseball glove after Connor complained that his dad was too busy to spend time with him, because Mr. Murphy has fond memories of playing catch with his own father. The Murphys pass these items on in hope their dreams for Connor will live on in Evan.