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37 pages 1 hour read

William Styron

Darkness Visible

Nonfiction | Book | Adult | Published in 1989

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Symbols & Motifs

Darkness

Styron takes the title of the book, Darkness Visible, from John Milton’s epic poem Paradise Lost and his description of hell. Darkness doesn’t refer to the absence of light; in Paradise Lost, darkness visible is the antithesis of light. By “darkness visible” are “sights of woe, regions of sorrow, doleful shades.” It obscures the positive while highlighting the negative, and it describes the figurative darkness of suffering through depression.

Styron describes the mental fog of depression, a loss of insight that made it difficult for Styron to see his own life accurately. He also describes the way imaginary darkness and shadows descended upon his home and places that were once a comfort to him. Depression also took Styron to the darkest places in his psyche, where he imagined the worst and fantasized about death. There, the darkness trapped him and held him hostage; one of the deadliest symptoms of depression is the inability to see past the pain and imagine a future without it. Just as he couldn’t believe that the treatments offered would help him, he also couldn’t see his own progress or the ways in which the depression was falsely imprisoning him until after he had escaped. He compares recovery to a light at the end of the tunnel, where he finally emerged on the other side and rejoined the living.

The title of the memoir encapsulates the darkness and mystery surrounding depression and mental illness. Mental illness is poorly understood by most people who haven’t experienced it. This unfamiliarity was particularly true in the 1980s, when depression was little-acknowledged mystery even to those who were medical professionals. By telling his story, Styron makes his darkness visible, exposing vulnerable parts of his own personal life in order to bring the disease to light.

Sisyphus

Styron talks about his fascination with French philosopher Albert Camus, whose work has always spoken to him. In particular, he references Camus’s essay “The Myth of Sisyphus.” Composed in a post-World War II world, with the recent inhumanities of man exposed, Camus’s essay is one of the bedrocks of postmodernist thought.

Camus compares humanity to Sisyphus of Greek mythology, who angered the gods by bringing fire to humanity. He was punished with the endless task of rolling a heavy boulder up a hill only for it to roll back down, which meant he had to roll it back uphill for all eternity. According to Camus, life is absurd and meaningless and there is no progress, only rolling the rock up the hill over and over. The central question of this essay concerns whether it is reasonable to commit suicide when life has no meaning.

Although the essay concludes that humans must continue fighting and surviving, Styron muses about Camus’s death. Camus was likely depressed and riding in the car of a known reckless driver, so Styron speculates that perhaps his death was at least passively suicidal. Styron describes the experience of depression as comparable to Sisyphus’s punishment: constant, exhausting work, with no end and no reward in sight. In the throes of depression, even the good things that happen seem ingenuine or undeserved. Additionally, there is no cure for depression, so recovery is always temporary. When faced with a new depressive episode, one must begin again to roll the rock uphill.  

Styron’s Notebook

Styron kept a journal-like notebook that chronicled his days and his thought processes, in which he wrote sporadically. It included notes and observations, and he hints that he had plans to use it professionally. Because he is a writer, the notebook was significant: It suggested the hopefulness of a future project. Although the notebook wasn’t exactly scandalous, he still protected it as personal. It was something that he felt must die with him rather than being invaded and read after his death, so it became a symbol of hope. When he decided that suicide seemed inevitable, he destroyed the notebook, a recognition that hope was lost.

What Styron ultimately left behind, when he died, were his pieces of his writing. Had he followed through and committed suicide, his writing would likely be where his family would have turned for answers. This notebook would probably have offered some insight into his daily thinking and even what led to his death. Destroying it, along with his decision not to leave a note, was part of his decision to die in silence. Thus, the notebook also became an extension of Styron and his living mind.

One of the symptoms of depression, as Styron describes it, is self-hatred, or a failure of self-esteem. In this sense, suicide is not simply a method of exiting an otherwise inescapable life of pain; it’s about self-destruction because of a feeling that one is not worthy to remain in the world. By destroying the notebook, he erased himself and the thoughts he recorded. Although Styron did rid himself of the notebook—and, even when he decided to live, never attempted to find it—he didn’t burn it or destroy it fully. The disposal of the notebook signaled that he recognized he might die; its non-destruction reveals that he truly wasn’t prepared to take his life.

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