Anything But Typical

Jason is home, writing a new story about a little person, carefully avoiding the slur “midget” and instead using the descriptor “dwarf.” He notes how interesting it is that the alphabet can make different combinations, sometimes resulting in words that hurt so much. In his story, Bennu comes from a family of normal sized people. Bennu sees himself as “defective” (75), which is not the same as being “different”: If someone is “different, that is a good thing. But if they have a defect, that is not” (76). Bennu struggles with the same issues that Jason does: It is not easy for him to find a girlfriend and his body can sometimes be very painful, since “sometimes just being Bennu is very hard to be” (75). Jason discusses the importance of names, in writing and in how names make people feel. He chose the name Bennu for his protagonist because he was hoping PhoenixBird would get the reference: “Bennu is the Egyptian word for phoenix. For phoenix bird” (78).

Jason’s dad comes into his room to talk about what happened at Uncle Bobby’s. Jason notes that his father is easier to be around because he talks less than his mother, and seems to want less from Jason than she does. His dad asks if anything is going on that Jason wants to talk about. When his dad tells Jason that his feelings are ok, but hurting Seth is not, Jason pulls his own hair and gets worked up as he thinks about how he acted and thinks about what will happen to him when his dad is no longer there to take care of him. Jason thinks, but cannot say, how sorry he is for making his dad sad. After he kicked Seth, his aunt Carol came in the room and shouted at Jason. Jason’s mother shouted too. Jeremy got angry and tried to explain to the adults what happened, and Jason’s head felt like it exploded. Then they rushed out of the house, smelling the dessert they were not going to enjoy. 

At school, Jason tells Aaron Miller that he has a girlfriend. During lunch, Aaron is the only person Jason sits with, now that he doesn’t have his aide. Aaron asks what his girlfriend’s name is, and Jason realizes he doesn’t actually know. He focuses instead on his tray of cafeteria lunch food. When they finish eating, Aaron throws his crumpled paper bag into the trash like a basketball, saying he hopes to meet this girlfriend someday soon.

The rest of the day Jason thinks about PhoenixBird, what her real name could be, and what she might be like. Lost in thought about her, he shreds his math book without realizing it until his teacher stops him. When Jason looks down at the mess he has made of tiny pieces of white paper, he imagines snowflakes—endless “possibilities within the hundreds of configurations of each water molecule of vapor as it turns into a hexagonal form of ice” (84). The math teacher tells Jason to clean it up the paper while his class goes to see a play. As he crawls under the desk to pick up the pieces, he thinks about how often he is in trouble, and “so used to not getting what I want” (86). He decides that PhoenixBird is his virtual girlfriend, but he won’t talk about her with people anymore.  

At dinner, Jeremy wants to use his plate with dividers even though his mom wants him “to get used to eating off a regular plate, because not everybody in the world will be able to accommodate him” (89). Hearing this, Jason realizes that his mom’s fixation on Jeremy’s food quirk is really a reaction to Jason’s issues: “again I know she is really talking about me. In code” (89).

The plate decree makes Jeremy cry. Jason believes boys are not supposed to cry since people don’t like to see boys cry, telling boys that cry why they shouldn’t be upset. Jason compares Jeremy’s tears to snowflakes. Although his parents can’t see the different layers in Jeremy’s feelings or experience, Jason can.

Jason manages to speak to Jeremy, explaining that sometimes food touches, and it is ok. His parents are stunned. Jason knows that they have blamed him for Jeremy’s need for the special plate, even though Jason has never been bothered by food touching. Jeremy, still crying, tries to eat dinner from a regular plate. Jason observes Jeremy’s resignation with his previous cool logic: “finally, you figure out it’s better not to cry in the first place” (92).