All My Rage

Noor rejects the plea deal, and Khadija encourages her to fight for her future by testifying. Noor is hesitant, though, and afraid. Khajdija convinces Noor to attend graduation, and Noor appreciates how Khadija made sure she kept up with her school assignments. At graduation, Noor sits with Ashlee and wonders where Salahudin is; she hasn’t seen him since he brought her the UCLA acceptance letter. As they wait for the ceremony to begin, they notice a teacher and Principal Ernst huddled over a phone. Ashlee explains that she took a video of Jamie’s racist comments to Noor and Salahudin and sent it to Princeton’s dean of admissions and an online news outlet called Feedbait, which published an article about Jamie. The article indicates that Jamie’s admission to Princeton has been rescinded. Jamie’s valedictorian speech is skipped during the ceremony, and Shafiq and Khadija come and find Noor afterward, cheering her on. In that moment, Noor decides to fight for her future and opens herself to the possibility that she may get to attend UCLA.

Salahudin calls Imam Shafiq for help when he finds Abu weeping in the shower next to a broken bottle of whiskey, his feet bleeding. Salahudin has an honest moment with Abu, telling his father that he can’t give up and stop being a dad because of his pain. With Shafiq, Salahudin cleans up his father and rids the house of alcohol, and the next day, Shafiq brings Abu’s sponsor, Janice, to see him. Salahudin agrees to sell the motel, and Abu is still sober a week later when they meet with a real estate agent. A young Indian couple makes an offer on the hotel, and Salahudin knows they are the right buyers because “they see the place the way Ama did” (333). Salahudin asks Abu to tell him something he doesn’t know about Ama, and Abu obliges, sharing several stories. A day later, Abu visits Ama’s grave. Salahudin stays home because he feels he failed Ama and wants to make things right before going to her grave.

Noor and Salahudin’s trial begins on a hot summer day, and the lawyers make their opening statements. When Salahudin’s lawyer, Martin, blames Noor in his opening, Salahudin is angry; he specifically told Martin not to put any blame on Noor. When he sees Noor’s angry look, Salahudin promises internally to fix the situation. The next day, witnesses are called, including Noor’s boss from the hospital, who testifies to Noor’s upstanding character. Eventually, Noor takes the stand confidently, and Salahudin is called next. He does his breathing exercises—the ones Dr. Ellis taught him—and takes the stand.

Khadija wears different colored hijabs to symbolize different moods, and today, she wears red, white, and blue to symbolize victory. Salahudin asks to read a statement while on the stand and begins reading it when the judge grants permission despite Martin’s objections. Salahudin explains why he started selling drugs—to save the motel after Ama died—and takes all the blame for everything, saying that all the drugs belonged to him. He tells the full truth about what happened and takes complete responsibility. Noor is shocked and thankful for Salahudin’s testimony as the lawyers confer with the judge privately. When they return to the courtroom, the judge announces that the DA is dropping the charges against Noor, while Salahudin’s trial will continue in the morning as usual. Noor and Salahudin make eye contact, and Noor recites Ama’s words to him: “If we are lost, God is like water…finding the unknowable path when we cannot” (345).